I’ve always been a girl with BIG DREAMS and the courage to go after them.
AT 8, I STARTED CHASING A GOAL TO BE THE BEST IN THE WORLD. TEN YEARS LATER, I STOOD ATOP THE OLYMPIC PODIUM WITH A GOLD MEDAL AROUND MY NECK.
CHILDHOOD DREAM COME TRUE.
As my dreams were happening:
I stood atop the podium with my teammates, taking in the moment I had been dreaming about for a decade, while the grip of the inner critic was growing louder - hyper-analyzing all the places I fell short and all the ways I missed the mark.
Even on that night in Sydney the podium moment didn’t end my emotional pain. Winning gold wasn’t even enough.
What I know now: Nothing “out there” will ever be, because standing in our self-worth is an inside job.
Thankfully;
Within a few months of my fall into darkness, I found my way to an amazing mentor who helped me develop the skill set and supports to navigate my mental health challenges.
Challenges that we all experience as humans.
And for some of us, myself included, those challenges include navigating serious mental health challenges. Thanks to my work with Greg Harden, who I credit with saving my life, I finished my career healthier, happier and faster than I had ever been, serving as co-captain of the 2005 NCAA DI Swimming & Diving National Championship Team.
Thirteen years later…
My infant daughter needed open-heart surgery, and I found myself leaning on the skills I honed in those weekly sessions with Greg. As if open-heart surgery wasn’t hard enough, the hard that followed when Mia’s heart failed brought me to my knees. After weeks on life support, her heart eventually recovered - a miracle, they say.
That experience - and the healing journey that followed, were in every way my cracking open. Every ounce of my being was rocked to the core, realizing at the deepest level that this is it: We aren’t guaranteed tomorrow.
The illusion of control I had lived so much of my life under shattered into a million pieces. There was no amount of trying harder that would fix her heart or protect me from the intense pain I felt inside...It didn't keep me safe. There was no where I could do more. No where to just try harder. The 41 days bedside forced me to just BE.
Once again, I was reminded that asking for and receiving help is one of the bravest things we’ll ever do. I surrendered. And when we left the hospital with our daughter in our arms, I vowed keep my head up - even when that meant turning toward hard things. This is our one life. Curveballs will come; some will knock us to our knees.
And: Our power isn’t in the not-falling or not-feeling;
our power is in our response.
The thing is…
Our brains are hardwired to keep us alive - and protect us from pain.
The armor we wear most likely protected us from pain at some point in our lives (it did for me). And in this moment, we must ask ourselves:
What’s it protecting me from today? Is it still serving me? Truly serving me?
What’s the cost of showing up and being seen? What’s the cost when I don’t?
What’s the cost of feeling and healing - and turning toward hard things? What’s the cost when I don’t?
Striving for mastery of our inner world is hard work, no doubt. It’s harder than any test set I’ve ever done.
The thing is, it’s not nearly as hard as living our lives stuck inside small boxes, suffocating under the weight of the armor, exhausted by the what-iffing and constant fear of feeling. Because, in the words of NYT Best Selling Author + Activist, Glennon Doyle,
We can do hard things. When we have the support and skills to do so.
Stepping off the treadmill allowed me to plant my feet firmly on the ground in a world where big dreams coexist alongside self-love, acceptance, compassion and grace.
Through the pain – my roots grew deeper.
I experienced a depth of freedom, balance and inner peace I didn't know were possible. And as much as I fought it at first, I learned how to step into the pause - so I could tune in and listen. So I could heal the parts of me that needed to be set free. In doing so, I rediscovered my inner magic.
You can too. And, I’d love to help you get there.
PROFESSIONAL BIO
Samantha Arsenault Livingstone is an Olympic gold medalist, high-performance consultant, speaker and mental health activist. At home in the classroom, Samantha spent six years teaching high school science and coaching swimming. After a near-death experience with her then 12-month-old daughter, Samantha knew it was time to pay forward all she'd learned about high achievement, rising through hard things, and finding fulfillment in the striving.
In 2016, Samantha founded Livingstone High Performance and the Whole Athlete Initiative (the WAI) in response to the mental health crisis impacting adolescents across the globe. Livingstone High Performance provides pillars of support to organizations, teams, and individuals to elevate mental wellbeing and improve performance. Samantha holds a master's degree in science education and is a certified instructor of Mental Health First Aid, facilitator of Mindful Sports Performance Enhancement and STARR (Stress + Trauma Activate, Release + Rewire) certified.
In addition to private coaching, Samantha consults with business leaders and teams on wellness initiatives, mindful leadership, emotional agility and developing high-performance cultures.
Samantha was a member of the U.S. National Team, 1999 U.S. Pan Pacific Team and 2000 U.S. Olympic Team. As an 18-year-old, she stood atop the Olympic podium in Sydney, Australia after swimming the lead-off leg of the record-setting 4 x 200 Freestyle Relay. Post- Olympics, Samantha battled an eating disorder, depression and shoulder surgery. With the help of an amazing mentor, she rose from the rubble stronger, happier and healthier, ending her career as a 7 x NCAA All-American. To close out her career, Samantha led her teammates to the 2005 National Championship title as the co-captain of the Georgia Bulldogs.
She was named the 2005 NCAA Georgia Woman of the Year and is a recipient of the 2005 NCAA Top VIII Award given to student- athletes for their success on the fields and courts, in the classroom and in the community. She earned the Joel Eves award at the University of Georgia for earning the highest GPA of all student-athletes in her graduating class and was named to the CoSIDA Academic All-America 1st Team.
Samantha is the recipient of the 2023 Arch Award for her impact in business. In 2020, Samantha was named to the University of Georgia's Top 40 Under 40. She is currently a member of USA Swimming's Mental Health Task Force and serves as a global ambassador for Beyond Sport's Stay in the Game Network alongside NFL Hall of Famer, Brian Dawkins.
_Samantha resides in Berkshire County, Massachusetts with her husband and four daughters.
