Our Kids Are Counting On Us
For so many athletes, sport is an outlet to calm + center. A coping skill you could say.
What happens when a pandemic uproots all you’ve known and come to rely on, turning a tool into an added source of stress?
How do we respond as coaches? Where do we put our already-limited-time + already-taxed-energy?
The thing is - we are coaching humans - humans who compete in sport. As much as we may try to ignore the humanness part to just push through + get in the work — we can’t. It’s not something you can separate.
It’s time to put down the old belief that we must sacrifice ourselves to achieve greatness.
[ Is it really greatness if we become broken in the process? ]
What I know for sure - the podium moments don’t protect us from hurt.
When the lights go out and the camera crews go home, we’re still human.
The cost of not-seeing + not-honoring the wholeness of who we are (human) and uncoupling it from what we do (compete, perform, parent, coach, etc.) is extraordinarily high.
When we’re continually seeking something out there to quench our quest to know that we’re enough, we stay in a perpetual state of chasing, into the darkness.
Because, nothing out there could ever be enough.
In some cases, that darkness can become debilitating, even life-threatening. It was for me.
Two months after winning gold at the Sydney Olympics, I was battling depression, an eating disorder and suicidal ideation.
On the outside, it looked as though I had it all together. On the inside, a very different truth.
Thankfully, my coach at the time noticed.
He noticed and knew where to send me - to the office of Greg Harden where I’d spend the next two years walking my way to recovery. (Same incredible man that helped TB12 navigate his challenges at Michigan. And MP. And 1000s of other humans who competed in sports and were lucky enough to land in his office.)
It’s really hard to think about what might have happened if my coach hadn’t noticed. Or if he noticed, but didn’t know what to say or who to turn to. I cannot say with certainty that I’d be here.
In the past five years, high profile athletes have been amplifying their voices, demanding to be seen as humans. We don’t have to look further than Athlete A or the Weight of Gold to hear story after story of unnecessary suffering in sport.
In a series of tweets, Martellus Bennett (NFL) highlights the Superhuman Trap - and the culture of mask-wearing that began long before COVID. He writes,
“Athletes mask their pain everyday for years to be tough. Do you know how thick that mask becomes after years and years of wearing it? And what type of inner struggle it creates when it comes to communicating the pains you endure after? Most guys/women (this is something all athletes experience) probably think they’re just being a little b— about some stuff and never truly address and it eats at em more and more everyday."
It doesn’t have to be that way.
There’s a new way to lead in sport - one where we cultivate greatness by honoring the health of the WHOLE athlete - human first, athlete second.
To do so is going to require a shedding of old beliefs that no longer serve us, especially when it comes to the brain health of our athletes - their ability to regulate their internal world - and their well-being as humans.
Over this last year, we’ve watched an already urgent crisis grow into a pandemic of its own kind.
The mental health of our children is taking a hit.
While it’s hard to explicitly find direct causation, we know that ER visits are up, pedis across the country are raising concerns and suicide rates in our youth have climbed (in some cities, doubled).
This isn’t something happening out there — it’s right here in our homes + towns.
Experts note that ER visits are up because we’re missing the early warning signs.
I’m not interested in throwing around blame. I want to help build a village full of Equipped Noticers. And there’s no better place to start than with coaches.
They’re on the front lines of the MH crisis, with a unique vantage point — more often than not without the skills or confidence to actively engage.
It’s stressful for them - on top of an already stressful time.
There’s certainly no shortage of info, trainings, talks or fb groups dedicated to craft mastery — training the technical and the physical.
But what about the minds of our athletes? What about the health of their brain?
Are we equipped to Notice warning signs? Do we have the language and skills? Resources ready if there’s an issue?
Chances are high that the answer is no — or not really.
Which is why I teamed up with Dr. Katie Kilty, sports psychology consultant + tenured prof, and Lynn Hennighausen, MS., National Trainer, MHFA to launch WholeHealth Sport in August of 2020. We’ve synthesized our years of expertise in sport and mental well-being to equip coaches with the training, skills and support needed to change the narrative, culture and game regarding mental well-being in sport.
We want to help. And, we are.
We’re bringing coaches from all sports + continents together to skill up on the mental health front via an international public health program, Mental Health First Aid — and then we walk with them so they, too, can become Equipped Noticers.
Unlike so many check-the-box trainings, we help coaches take the skills and transfer them to real-world, everyday challenges.
We’re 35 strong with an athlete reach of over 3000 so far.
We’ve got this.
If you’re coaching, raising or leading athletes — please help us spread the word.
Our kids are counting on us.
Let’s do this.
Samantha Arsenault Livingstone is an Olympic gold medalist, high-performance consultant, speaker and mental health advocate. In 2016, Samantha founded Livingstone High Performance and the Whole Athlete Initiative (the WAI) in response to the mental health crisis impacting adolescents across the globe. LHP provides pillars of support to organizations, teams and individuals to elevate mental health and improve performance.
In 2020, Samantha co-founded WholeHealth Sport to equip coaches and parents with the training, skills and support needed to change the narrative, culture and game regarding mental well-being in sport.
In addition to private and group coaching, Samantha consults with teams and organizations on athlete wellness initiatives, leadership, strategic planning, rising skills and developing high-performance cultures. She is a certified instructor of Mental Health First Aid for adults working with youth and a facilitator of Mindful Sports Performance Enhancement.
Samantha is the founder and facilitator of two, multi-module online courses, the Rise Free Academy and Ride the Wave — inspiring, empowering and equipping others with the skills + supports needed to become more mindful, courageous, resilient leaders.
Samantha and her husband, Rob, live in New England with their four daughters. To learn more about her offerings, go over to www.samanthalivingstone.com.